Jan 23, 2005
and i wish i wasn't so alone..

holy shit! i totally forgot i had this! its been like forever since i updated this thing but i dont care cuz i never go into it anyway.. lots of shit happened since i last wrote in here but i dont feel like typing anything so i'm gonna go and i love you all <3

1. How many friends do you have: alot.. and i love them all! <3

2. Most Athletic: george

3. Trouble maker: stephen

4. Loudest: christopher!                                  

5. Shortest: Kal                                                                                          

6. Ditziest: caseroony

7. Airhead: unger

8. Funniest: morgan               

9. Bestest friend: i have many =)                                                                         

10: Gets you into trouble: i create my own disaster

11: Cant keep a secret: joseph

12: Best dancer: phil

13: Twin: me and emily used to look exactly alike when we were little.. now she like 5 million feet taller than me haha                                                                                          

14. Tallest: alot of the guys

15. Rebellious: sean

16. Shy: nick               

16: Cockiest: william

17: Randomist: morgan

18. Best hand puppet : AVERY HAHAHAHA lunch

19. Spontaneous: kenny

20. Down to earth: sean                                                                         

21. Brave: laurann and kory

22. Attitude: avery

23. Wierdest: we all have our moments

24. Prettiest: everyone =)

25. Best smile:  definately joes                                                                                

26. Coolest: kory and phil

27. Best Singer: stephen and morg

28. Kid at heart: billy.. no questions

29. Best intensions: kory

30. Craziest: my boys!

31. Drinking buddy: jen!

32. Funniest drinking buddies: phil

33. Best hair: ungers

34. Photogetic: sv mal

35. Smartest: sean.. hes a fucking genius                                                                              

36. Awsome: kory and phil!                                                                                    

37. Sabatage partner: william michael riedel ;-)                                                                               

38. Keep it real: laurann and kory

39. GYm crew: Me, kaleigh, avery, britney, unger, mal

40. Changed the most: britney

41. Gullable: Ashley

42. True to the music they listen to: joseph

43. most likely to become a stripper: Ashley

44. most likely to Succeed: kory

45. Nut case haha: i would definately have to take the blame for that one

46. Clumbsiest: alittle guilty for that one as well

47. most energy: billy

48. Most serious: steven

50. laughs to much: drew

51. best sheep noises: ariel and emily

52. worst temper: mike

53. Best freestyle lol :phil!                       

54. Just gotta love em: laurann.. R.I.P. __forever in our hearts__ kory, phil, johnny mac, britney, trevor, mike, courtney, morgan, joe jake, nate, casey, jake, drew, cory, stephen, steven, maria, jackie, elaina,  unger, avery, jasmine, josh, steve, nate, brown, julia, laura, flick, travis, nick, miranda, kathryn, ali, nate, phil, sam, eric, sarah, sauppee, bryan, wargo, zach, jim, anthony, addie, kimberly, kyle, nemo, cori, collin, mitch, andrew, jimmy, bp, george, billy, kevin, kenny, scott, chris, sean, jake, shompo, lynne, claire, kaleigh, mal, ethan, sean, shane, carly, erin, sam, emily, ariel, and the list goes on and on.. if i forgot you dont worry i still love you just as much as everyone that i named<3

Just imagine if you knew you were gonna do something important with your life.. something amazing. and it may be the most important thing anyone has ever done. but theres a catch.. something terrible has to happen..


Posted at 11:01 am by DancingQueen27
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Nov 17, 2004
so kiss me like you did

ugh...im just sooo confused! i have just so many mixed feelings right now and its driving me crazy...=( hopefully things will get better and this confusion will stop and i can just live my life withought all of this...this just breaks my heart to know that either way prolly not gonna be happy and there will always be that place in my heart wondering if made the right choices and if my life would be better if i hadn't made them in the first place...

Posted at 10:55 pm by DancingQueen27
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Nov 14, 2004
me and my cult will come for you now

wow i really love that...alot!!!

Posted at 07:18 pm by DancingQueen27
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Nov 13, 2004
i wont let go

I AM: alli boo!
I WANT: my new snowboard
I HAVE: a pool
I WISH: i was at the beach
I HATE: spiders!!
I MISS: Seattle
I FEAR: spiders!!
I HEAR: the instant message noise
I SEARCH: for my ipod charger
I WONDER: why i'm filling this out
I REGRET: every lie ive ever told
I LOVE: my pillow <3
I ACHE: when i dont feel good
I ALWAYS: pray and talk to laurann before i go to bed.. laurann fink R.I.P. 8/9/05 may angels lead you in
I AM NOT: RICH! stupid people get that out of your minds!
I DANCE: about 7 hours a week
I SING: in the shower and the car
I CRY: every night when i talk to laurann
I WRITE: when needed
I WIN: never!
I LOSE: pretty much all the time
I CONFUSE: some people
I NEED: my pillow when i sleep
I SHOULD: get a job

[YES OR NO]
You keep a diary: nope
You have a secret journal: nope
You set your clock a few minutes ahead: yep
You bite your fingernails: ohh yeah
You believe in love: 100%

[DO YOU]
Take a shower everyday: yeah man
Have a(any) crush(es): yep yep
Think you know you've been in love: nope..
Want to get married: absolutely
Have any tattoos/where?: i want one
Piercings/where?: ears and bellybutton
Get motion sickness: not really
Get along with your parents: yep.. i love my fam =)

[WHEN YOU SEE THIS NAME YOU THINK OF?]

Mike: my brother
Matt: wargo
Drew: kory and phil
Ashley: karli
Will: william michael riedel
Nikki: george
Paul: uncle paul
Eve: sculpture class
George: firkaly <3 
Lauren: laurann fink.. R.I.P. <3
Tyler: seidel
Eric: horning

[FAVORITE]
NUMBER: 27
COLOR: yellow
DAY: saturday
MONTH: march
SONG: dont have a favorite
FOOD: watermelon
SEASON: winter
SPORT: snowboarding!
VEGGIE: all of them! mostly carrots
FRUIT: watermelon
FAST FOOD: taco bell!

[IN THE LAST 24 HOURS, HAVE YOU]
HELPED SOMEONE? yep
BOUGHT SOMETHING? nope
GOTTEN SICK? nope
GONE TO THE MOVIES? nope
GONE OUT FOR DINNER? yeah
SAID "I LOVE YOU"? absolutely
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER?: im going to today
TALKED TO AN EX? yep yep
MISSED AN EX? nope
WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL? no that would involve writing which is something i despise
TALKED TO SOMEONE YOU CRUSH ON? mmmm yeah =)
MISSED SOMEONE? ohhh yeah
HUGGED SOMEONE? yep yep
FOUGHT WITH YOUR PARENTS? yeah
FOUGHT WITH A FRIEND? nope

Posted at 11:11 pm by DancingQueen27
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Nov 12, 2004
-ill wait for you...but i can't wait forever-

hey people...guess who is on the basketball cheerleading squad! anyway...weather forcast for my throat, a whole lot of NOTHING...i lost my voice cuz of some people (MIKE AND STEVE!), i like cant say anything nd like everyone was making fun of me for it =( oh well their just jealous cuz they all have to talk to their teachers and sing in chorous! HA!! look who doesnt?!?! in other news...my life is like a piece of paper...REALLY BORING. i seriously need a life, like right now. so im leaving, bye. -me

Posted at 10:18 pm by DancingQueen27
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Nov 5, 2004
GO FELICIA!

SkOoTuRbOoT89: ALLISON BARNETT  YOU ROCK MY SOCKS RIGHT OFF  wow! that makes my day! =)



FELICIA SCHEIDT IS THE GREATEST PERSON IN THE WORLD!!!






see...if the rest of you people were nice to me i would put your name in my profile...but at the moment that only works for felicia because everyone else is mean to me =(

Posted at 12:27 am by DancingQueen27
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Nov 4, 2004
kiss me like you did

this week was boring...no school tomorrow though. thats a plus. guess what i am right now...hint: it starts with a b and ends with an o-r-e-d. yes my life is...   ...right now...ill get over it eventually. anywho...we lost our game yesterday. =( but we still get to play in more games which is a good thing. okay enough about soccer...i cant think of anything else to say right now so im leaving. bye.

plans for today: undecided (again)

phrase of the week: that makes my day - or - that makes me laugh

note to self: blah

Posted at 12:38 pm by DancingQueen27
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Oct 31, 2004
...i'll run away with you...

i guess i can tell you all happy halloween. its gonna be boring for me but oh well...not too many plans for going anywhere tonight. life goes on i guess. in other news...WARNING: it is possible to get grounded by someone who isnt related to you...from my own experience, it CAN AND WILL HAPPEN! yes, scary stuff. oh well. we won our soccer game last night, that was exciting. hopefully we will get to states, that would make my year...so will ski club! i cant fucking wait...i think im going next weekend to get my board waxed. yeah i think this year is gonna kick ass...last year i only went like 4 times which sucked but this year im gonna go like a million times. which would also kick ass. i have no life. im gonna go look for one. bye.


fav word of the week: WOAH!

plans for today: undecided

note to self: when mike leaves for college...turn his room into a duck room...that includes the bathroom...thats also gonna kick ass

Posted at 02:31 pm by DancingQueen27
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Oct 24, 2004
this world is coming to an end

one word of advise...shocktoberfest is really gay...it deserves to retire. ive finally come to the conclusion that i seriously need a life. its pretty sad if you think about it. oh well...ive also come to realize that my brother is really lame. even he has started calling me mikes sister...i dont think he realizes that he's mike. i think kenny is over me now...we can all be happy about that one. my dog just ran into a wall...i should start doing that. it might get me smarter...and if not then it was worth a try. im hungry. bye.

plans for today: watch tv...

note to self: i need a life...start looking for one tomorrow. try running into a wall today...your inner genious is bound to come out sometime.

Posted at 01:14 pm by DancingQueen27
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Sep 4, 2004
this is lame...

favorites:
Color:: yellow
season:: summer and winter
drink:: dr. pepper
class:: dont have one
sport:: snowboarding cheerleading and dance
movie:: no clue
food:: watermelon
state:: washington, alaska, or maryland
place:: seattle or everywhere in alaska 
thing in your room:: my pillow <3
relative:: chris
animal:: penguin
time of the day:: night
thing to do:: lots
song:: general - dispatch
~~~About your friends~~~
Who would you say you're closest to:: britney
Knew the longest:: drew
Smartest:: sean
funniest:: morgan
most friendly:: laurann..R.I.P. __a true angel__ <3 
most outgoing:: joe
happiest:: laurann
saddest:: nobody
most unsmart lol:: unger lol 
newest friend:: nate and johnny mac
weirdest:: morgan
one you can't stand:: clint and bryan
farthest away (i know i asked this already): chris jacobson.. miss you kid!
most creative:: billy and stephen 
GUY friend you like the most:: kory phil and johnny mac!
funnest:: morgan 
most untrustworthy:: i can trust all my friends =)
can keep secrets well:: joe, jackie, and unger
most talkative:: ashley lol
one you talk to the most:: as of right now johnny mac
one you hang out with the most:: britney and casey
*****Best subject every1 wants to know about: BOYS!!!
do you have a boyfriend:: nope
if yes what's his name:: .. nobody lol
if no, do u have a crush:: absolutely =)
if yes: what's his name: mmmmm =)
(boyfriend or crush) where did u first meet him:: dont remember
favorite thing about him:: everything =)
how long have u liked/gone out with him:: dont remember
guys in general: what's your favorite thing about them: personality
What do you honestly see first in a guy looks or personality: well looks first obviously but when i get to know em i get to know their personality
what was the youngest you've ever had a guy like you:: before i even started preschool
when was your first crush:: before i even started preschool
first boyfriend:: before i even started preschool
How many serious boyfriends have u had: alot
Here are some randoms, lol.
What is on your favorite pair of socks:: pumas
whats your favorite snack:: tastycakes! 
Favorite channel:: mtv, vh1, cartoon network for FAMILY GUY, and abc family for FULL HOUSE!
how many pairs of jeans do you have:: i think about 10
how many shoes... everyone loves shoes!:: only 5 that i wear.. but probably about 40 total
which one do you like the most: all my flip flops.. and my pumas 
favorite brand of water: fiji 
which ice cream flavor do you think is the best:: cookies and cream, chocolate chip cookie dough
what about the brand:: no clue
where do you like to eat the best:: panera and taco bell!!!
longest you've ever stayed awake: all night =)
which friend comes and sleeps over most often: idk.. they all usually sleep over here for parties 
who's house do you go to the most (friend wise that is): caseys
favorite thing to do in the summer: hang out w/friends
favorite thing to do in winter: SNOWBOARDING!!! 
do you have a website: yep.. i have 3 lol
do you like flowers: yep
what's your favorite clothing brand: no clue 
shoe brand: pumas and just any kind of flip flops
END OF SURVEY!!!
did u like this survey:: sure
wut time did u end it: 2:08
did it make u less bored: i guess so.. ?
did it make you happy!?: not really sorry
are you glad it's over: lol kinda
are you bored now that it's over: not really
what are you gonna do about it: um.. nothing
then go do it: lol alright
bye: bye
buh bye!: bye
GO ALREADY!: fine!

Posted at 09:28 pm by DancingQueen27
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HASH(0x8b99838)
SWEET TEEN!!! Yes you are a teenager mmmm from 13
- 19 quite a little rebel haha just kidding...
You think as a teenager, you see everything
quite simple, soon you will realize it is not
that simple. In my opinion you look at things
in a very beautiful way. =)


. What is you inner age?
brought to you by Quizilla

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

tbs
Youre Taking back Sunday's WHERE YOU WANT TO BE.
Passionate and emo-licious, youre not afraid to
speak your mind. You know what you want and you
like to say it...LOUD.


What album are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
HASH(0x8b12fd8)
You're "Cheerleader". You love
cheerleading, Le Girl magazine, and looking so
good! You are popular and the leader of Teen
Girl Squad.


Which Member of Teen Girl Squad are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
<>
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HASH(0x8b15824)
Cotton Candy- Babe your a sweetheart and your
extremely nice you've got friends a plenty that
love you cause your addictive :)


JUNK FOOD QUIZ! What junk best decribes you?
brought to you by Quizilla>
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seem to stop my breath
My head on your chest
Waiting to cave in
From the bottom of my
Hear your voice again
Could we dim the sun
And wonder where we've been
Maybe you and me
So kiss me like you did
My heart stopped beating
Such a softer sin

[I'm melting, I'm melting]
In your eyes
I lost my place
Could stay a while

And I'm melting
In your eyes
Like my first time
That I caught fire
Just stay with me
Lay with me
Now

Never caught my breath
Every second I'm without you I'm a mess
Even though each other
Trust these words are stowed
My cuts are healing
Learning how to love

I'm melting [I'm melting]
In your eyes
I lost my place
Could stay a while
And I'm melting
In your eyes
Like my first time
That I caught fire
Just stay with me
Lay with me
[Stay with me lay with me now]

You could stay and watch me fall
And of course I'd ask for help
Just stay with me now
Take my hand
We could take our hands
I'll stay in bed and just make love that's all
Just stay with me now

I'm melting [I'm melting]
In your eyes
I lost my place
Could stay a while
and I'm melting

In your eyes
Like my first time
That I caught fire
Just stay with me
Lay with me
In your eyes
I lost my place
Could stay a while
and I'm melting
In your eyes
Like my first time
That I caught fire
Just stay with me lay with me
[Stay with me, lay with me]

In your eyes
Lets sleep till the sun burns out
I'm melting in your eyes [I'm melting in your eyes]
Lets leave down the the sunburns of
I'm melting in your eyes

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Small, simple, safe price.
Rise the wake and carry me with all of my regrets.
This is not a small cut that scabs, and dries, and flakes, and heals.
And I am not afraid to die.
I'm not afraid to bleed, and fuck, and fight.
I want the pain of payment.
What's left, but a section of pigmy size cuts.
Much like a slew of a thousand unwanted fucks.
Would you be my little cut?
Would you be my thousand fucks?
And make mark leaving space for the guilt to be liquid.
To fill, and spill over, and under my thoughts.
My sad, sorry, selfish cry out to the cutter.
I'm cutting trying to picture your black broken heart.
Love is not like anything.
Especially a fucking knife.

Like I fell, you can tell.
By the way I move into my head.
Do you think that it's me?
Or it's not me I don't even care.
I'm alive.
I swear I'm the cleanest I have ever been.
I feel pain.
I feel

Just look at me. Look at me now.
[I'm a fake, I'm a fake, I'm a fake, I'm a fake].
Just look at me. Look at me now.
[I'm a fake, I'm a fake, I'm a fake, I'm a fake].

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So deep, that it didn't even bleed and catch me
Off guard, red handed
Now I'm far from lonely
I sleep, I still see you lying next to me
So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me I...

I need something average
Someone please just give me
Hit me and knock me out
And let me go back to sleep
I can't laugh
All I want inside I still am empty
So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me I...

I'll be just fine
Pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely
And it's all that I've got

I'll be just fine
Predenting I'm not
I'm far from lonely
And it's all that I've got

I guess, I remember every glance you shot me
Un-harmed, I'm losing weight and some body heat
Eyes closed so hard
I stopped your heart from beating
So deep that I didn't even scream fuck me, I..

I'll be just fine
Pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely
And it's all that I've got

I'll be just fine
Predenting I'm not
I'm far from lonely
And it's all that I've got

And it's all that I've got
Yeah, it's all that I've got
It's all that I've got
It's all that I've got!

So deep that it didn't even bleed and catch me
So deep that I didn't even scream fuck me

I'll be just fine
Pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely
and it's all that I've got

I'll be just fine
Pretending I'm not
I'm far from lonely
And it's all that I've got

And it's all that I've got
Yeah, it's all that I've got

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If we cut out the bed
Well then we’d have nothing left
Like I cut up your mouth
The night I stuffed it all in
And you lied to the angels
Said I stabbed you to death
If we go at the same time
Now clean up the mess

I lost my head
You couldn’t come
This loss to my brain almost feels like a gun

Watch you bite into the bottle
Watch me kick out the chair
Let you chew up the glass
And laughed at you just on air
I had thought of those petals so perfectly pure
Then I thought of your petals
And the abuse they’ve been through

I lost my head
You couldn’t come
This loss to my brain almost feels like a gun
You lost your head
I couldn’t come
This loss to my brain almost feels like a gun
Whoa whoa

I told the angels
Cant stay in heaven
I asked the devil
If we cut out the bed well then we’d have nothing left
Like I cut up your angels
Yeah you stabbed me to death

I lost my head
You couldn’t come
This loss to my brain almost feels like a gun
You lost your head
I couldn’t come
This loss to my brain almost feels just like a gun

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm lying to myself
And this dagger's my excuse
I'm apalled
I Should have paid up
And I left an hour late
I was laid up

I must abuse myself
I'm against all that I've made up
Set in stone the sun will come
And I hate light
You know I hate light
Dont make it look so pretty burning

Burn the sun
Burn the light
Take take take take take take it away
Take my hand
Take my life
Take take take take take take it away

I must have caught something
In the heat of all these dances
I'm a worm with no more chances
And I've lost all doubt
In a chemical romance

I guess I'm bitching
At the thoughts of tarnished hope
It's kind of funny
The only feeling
I'm not in love
You know it's not love
Don't make it look so pretty burning

Burn the sun
Burn the light
Take take take take take take it away
Take my hand
Take my life
Take take take take take take it away

Burn the sun
Burn the light
Take take take take take take it away
Take my hand
Take my life
Take take take take take take it away

Brothers and sisters
I'm right here with you
Cause everyone's got one
I started to kill me
I'm so apathetic in my resentment
Living, loving, knowing this... in my resentment

Take my hand [x8]
Take my life
Take my heart take my mind
Take my life take my life

Burn the sun burn the lights
Take take take take take take it away
Take my hand take my life
Take take take take take take it away
Burn the signs burn the lights
Take take take take take take it away
Take my hand take my life
Take my life
Take my life
Take my life

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This poison's my intoxication
I broke a needle off in my skin
Pick the scabs and pick the bleeding
And assume that it was all in vein
Popping a scab that's never healing
It just hit me in the face
Burning bridges, So misleading
The poison's more important now with the pain

Let it bleed
Take the red for what it's worth woah
Watch the fire
Fill your lungs with smoke for the last time
If you feel like dying you might wanna sing

The fire department couldn't drown the city
They didn't even try to wash it clean
And what did you think that I was sober?
For me yea cause I'm on fucking fire
Popping a scab that's never healing
I'm proud that I kept this clean
The most that I can do for you is keep on lying
I'm tired of lying I think I'd rather sin

Let it bleed
Take the red for what it's worth woah
Watch the fire
Fill your lungs with smoke for the last time
If you feel like dying you might wanna sing!

Ohoh you might wanna sing
Ahaha you might wanna sing
Hahah you might wanna sing
Hahahaha sing!
You might wanna sing!
You might wanna sing!
You might wanna sing or scream at...

This poison's my intoxication
I broke a needle off in my skin
Pick the scabs and pick the bleeding
And yeah.. assume that it was all in vein

Let it bleed
Take the red for what it's worth, woah
Watch the fire
I'mma fill your lungs with smoke for the last time
If you feel like dying
If you feel like dying
If you feel like dying, You might wanna sing
Hahaha You might wanna sing
Haha You might wanna sing

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So let me take this medicine
to quench my love for violent things.
My strong tounge will
be like a bullet laced in anger
as the razor cuts the soft spot on your heel.

(It's back) It's getting slower.
(This war) It's getting harder
to fight by myself.
(This place) A bitter fashion.
(Ripped out) this shield that I have.
Tears rain from above.

Do you see the life I lead?

So follow me into the sun
and I will bleed the poision dry.

These bayonet scars never seize
to blind the light shed from the beast
and all we do is hate.

(Passion) from constant visions.
(Angels) A round of useless
good has lost its heart.

Do you see the life I lead?

So follow me into the sun
and i will bleed the posion dry.

For you [x2]
(For you!) [x3]

Bite to break skin.
Don't give the secret.
My soul with change.
Paint it with passion.
The Phoenix will die
inside the firestorm.
I am the son.
Follow my footsteps. [x2]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rest in peace girl, your death is such a shame.
The paper said a bullet got in your way.
But, I smell foul play, possible poisoning, I had to bring you in for questioning.
I went to your grave, dug up your body.
Brought it to my house, where you lay.

So let’s play doctor babe, we’ll operate today.
Incisions must be made. You could help solve this case, for me.

I headed downtown, to share what I had found.
It’s not a suicide, it’s a crime.
I have a witness, it’s clearly evident,
There had to be someone else present,
After time of death.
Poisons in stomach, how could she pull it if she’s dead?

So let’s play doctor babe, we’ll operate today.
Incisions must be made. You could help solve this case.
We need a scalpel now, under white lights you lay.
We’ve got to hurry up, before the flesh decays away.

I’ll catch the murderer and send him away.
I’ll get the evidence from your last day.

So let’s play doctor babe, we’ll operate today.
Incisions must be made. You could help solve this case.
We need a scalpel now, under white lights you lay.
We’ve got to hurry up, before the flesh decays away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hey there,
I know it's hard to feel like I don't care at all.
Where you are and how you feel.
Put these lights off as these wheels
keep rolling on and on. (and on and on and on...)
Slow things down or speed them up.
Not enough or way too much. (and on and on and on...)
are you and I gone?

*Chorus*
And I can't make it on my own.
(And I can't make it on my own.)
Because my heart is in Ohio.
So cut my wrists and black my eyes.
(Cut my wrists and black my eyes)
So I can fall asleep tonight, or die.
Because you kill me.
You know you do, you kill me well.
You like it too, and I can tell.
You never stop until my final breath is gone.

(Repeat 2x)
Spare me just three last words.
"I love you" is all she heard.
I'll wait for you, but I can't wait forever.

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